For many, a new year can bring with it a lot of excitement and eager anticipation. While for some, it’s the exact opposite: the new year brings with it dread, apprehension, and anxiety. The new year, though full of opportunities, can be completely daunting for those who have felt stuck and stagnant year after year.
Maybe you make the same resolution every single year and it falls apart or you get nowhere… What about that equation would make you excited at the promise of a fresh start in 2022? You might suggest that the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different outcome.
When your confidence has been trampled out of you year after year, how can you possibly make a confident leap into another new beginning?
Here’s the thing (and this is going to sound over-simple and maybe even a little cliche but it’s the truth): the past is in the past; so leave it there.
It’s gone. It’s done. Did 2020 suck?! For most of us, heck ya it did! And given the status of the ongoing global pandemic, 2021 has been another difficult year. These are the facts.
But I’m here to tell you, 2020 and 2021, don’t determine the outlook of 2022. They dictate how your life will go this year about as much as 1996, or 1953, or 1871, or even 1662?! As much as you have to learn from your mistakes, you don’t need to carry the burden of them any longer. Let it go; you don’t have to forget, but you can forgive. That goes for others as well as yourself.
So I urge you, first and foremost, to give yourself grace as you walk into 2022. Believe it or not, forgiveness: the power it holds, and the ability to give it meaningfully, to those who have wronged you, and even yourself, is a key to building confidence. And I’m NOT all about that “new year, new me” bull$**t. You are worth it. You are enough. Embrace your perfect imperfection. You don’t have to fundamentally change who you are to change an outcome.
If you want to step into the new year with confidence, or with the goal of building confidence in 2022, then I want nothing more than to help you do that. So, let’s talk about some ways you can help yourself achieve your new year’s resolution and build confidence in the process or as your ultimate goal.
For starters, it is important to set goals. No matter how many failuresm (or lessons it may take), keep challenging yourself, keep starting over; if you never give up, then you never really fail.
When setting your goals, you want to try to find a way to quantify or measure steps in the right direction; pick something attainable and remember to give yourself an adequate timeline. For instance, if you want to build confidence and be more social. Start small. Say to yourself, “I’m going to socialize one night per week,” whether that’s with colleagues, friends, in the dating game, or even teammates from a rec league–whether virtually on Zoom or in person.
You might think this sounds silly. But by holding yourself accountable to this commitment one night per week, and seeing it through, you’ll build confidence in recognizing that you set your mind to something and actually accomplished it: baby steps, as it were, or as I’d say, ‘baby bites.’
When setting goals, people will often tell you the age old saying, “don’t bite off more than you can chew.” And to an extent, I agree with them. Like I said, your end goal has to be something that is possible. Instead, however, I’d say cut off a piece as big as your heart desires, even if it’s more than you can chew, then just remember to take baby bites.
So, this year, don’t skip out on a new year’s resolution just because you feel you’ve failed in the past. I’ve been where you are, I came out the other side, and I’m here to help. And while you are the only you, and the most perfect you there ever will be, we can all use a clean slate sometimes: an opportunity to look inward, acknowledge our flaws, and do better.
Start taking steps to build your confidence today by challenging yourself a little and going out of your comfort zone, breaking out of that box. You don’t have to wait till January 1st! And even if you trip by January 2nd, get back up and TRY AGAIN. I guarantee your 2022 will look a whole lot different with a boost of confidence in your step, in yourself, and in your life.
Stay tuned! If you need a little help along the way… I’ve got big things coming in the new year to help you build a ConfidentU in 2022.
Hugs, Patricia
